“You’re Welcome“: Two of the most underrated words in the English Language. And
So many people are so very wonderful in all that they do. They are warm, inviting, helpful, compassionate. But, they undermine the value of what they do and, by osmosis, who they are simply by not using the words “You’re Welcome” They also diminish the other persons desire to express their gratitude to you. For this reason, we NEED to use the words “You’re Welcome” more often.
What do we typically answer when someone says “thank you” ?
“Da Nada” “No problem” “No biggie” “No big deal” and recently “No worries”
All of these are nice responses. They acknowledge the individuals expression of thanks but do they encourage people in this expression. The words do NOT express you’re appreciation of their gratitude. I don’t think so and here is why:
When someone says “Thank you” they are trying to GIVE YOU SOMETHING. They are trying to offer you their GIFT of appreciation and gratitude for what you are doing. The reasons for a thank you are so varied. They can be small ~ the opening of a door. They can be an out of the ordinary support ~ a ride to the airport. And, they can be huge ~ a kidney donation. Whatever the reason for the “Thank You” , it is a gift to YOU.
To respond to this gift with these words Da Nada” “No problem” “No biggie” “No big deal” and recently “No worries” says to the one who is offering this gift several things:
Please don’t feel that way.
Please don’t offer this up to me as I am not worthy of the praise and gratitude from you.
I’m the giver and your outward expression of appreciation makes me feel UNCOMFORTABLE.
Responding with a “No problem” does all of this. Of course, doing what you are do is typically ‘no problem’ because it is who you are in what you do. But is it really? Do you really want the exchange to have decreased value?
Additionally, here is what that response does do:
It puts up a shield between the two of you in conversation.
It blocks the energy of the person saying “Thank You” to you.
It keeps the two people from becoming ‘intimate’ in their appreciation for one another.
It doesn’t allow for a ‘full’ exchange of GRATITUDE and indeed LOVE between the two people.
So, when someone does something for you, after having read this, think twice about your response. Don’t let it be mundane or ‘cultural’. Receive the full expression of appreciation by acknowledging it for what it is. Indeed, use the words “You ARE welcome” What a difference not using the contraction of the words you are. Can you feel it? It’s inviting that other person IN all because of their expression of gratitude.
If you are one to diminish thank you’s, try this on for size: the more gratitude is acknowledge and appreciated the more of it you receive and the happy you both are. So say “YOU ARE WELCOME” for them AND for you!!!
What words do you use to express your appreciation back for someone’s acknowledgment of the kind deeds that you do? Do you WELCOME them in with all your heart or do you put your hand up and say “da nada”?
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